Big Bitter Mouth

Good intentions. Totally have them. Especially when it comes to my job. Sadly, my passion for what I do sometimes interferes with the "appropriate" way business needs to be conducted. Of course, if I REALLY wanted to be "appropriate" I wouldn't be in the radio biz.

I've been extremely lucky in the business of radio. Lots of folks have to move all over the country every few years and change jobs. Since I began in radio, I've been in two cities: Charlotte, NC & Columbia, SC. I started in Charlotte, moved to Columbia, and then came BACK to Charlotte. WAY lucky! Of course, it's taken me a few years to realize that luck is only PART of the reason I've been able to be in these two great cities. Talent has something to do with it as well.

For many years, I've been the "yes" or "no problem" girl. At work and in lots of my relationships. If you know me, you wouldn't think this of me. I think my last marriage wore me down. Not just personally, but in ALL aspects of my life. Within the last few months I've been standing up for myself in my personal & my professional life. And it's felt freakin' awesome! Odd and strange, but awesome! "Talent" isn't something I've ever thought about before. I've always just felt lucky. And I am! But this year I realized that I DO have talent & that talent is WHY I've been so lucky!

I have an unbelieveable passion for music. That passion is what fueled my interest in radio. Once I began in radio, I loved it! Truely. I love everything about it: the wacky personalities, the crazy hours, the relaxed atmosphere, the music, the insanity...........LOVE IT! Sadly, as many do, myself included, I let that love blind me for a bit. I realized this year that I wasn't getting back what I was putting into my job. I know, I know.........in this economy if you have a job be grateful! AND I AM! Trust me. BUT.......the passion that I had and the love that I had was fading. Fast. I was being pulled in too many directions.

I, for once, stood up for myself. NOT in the most appropriate way, BUT I stood up for myself. Something I haven't done personally or professionally in WAY too long. I knew there was a risk. Hell, I could have easily have been fired. My mouth went off before my brain had time to catch up. THIS doesn't always work well for me as my mouth tends to get me in trouble. Lots. :)

Yet I did it. And I'm glad I did! Now, don't get me wrong. I should have expressed my concerns in a more professional fashion. Next time, I'll know. Sadly, passion for what you do or who you are sometimes wins and "professional" or "appropriate" just doesn't matter. There are times in life you just have to stand up for WHO you are and what you feel. Does it always work? Nope. Does it matter? Nope. If you can look at yourself in the mirror and feel proud of who and what you ARE, that is all that matters at the end of the day.

All the above said, I am still wicked glad I have my job. Damn I have a big mouth sometimes. :) Good thing.